long long day

Today has been one heck of a long day, I never go out for more than a few hours, I don't like being out, I don't like being around people, I don't like the unsafety of being away from home, the only times I have been away from home have been for hospital and other things not  by choice.

I went to Swansea today, I live in Wiltshire, Swansea is in Whales, along way away. I had to get up at half 6, I had to leave the house by 10 mins past 7. I got home about half hour ago (8:10ish). I am exhausted, actually exhausted doesn't quite describe it, I am beyond exhausted. I went with two other friends to visit a friend who has just moved to Swansea. I find being around people exhausting, I find keeping up with conversations draining,  I find smiling a chore. I was so anxious about going today and thought of many excuses in my head to not go, but I went. It was good, I think I kept up with everything OK, I had lunch with every one, they had proper lunch, I had a cheese and tomato toasty, which was discretely purged in the toilet before leaving where we had lunch. Later in the afternoon we stopped for coffee, I again indulged and joined everyone in a hot chocolate, mine with skimmed milk (as if that makes much of a difference!), along with a piece of chocolate tiffan cake, unfortunately again purged before continuing on our shopping trip. I got away with it!

I bought some new pyjamas, lovely fleecy ones to keep me warm in this horrible cold snap we are having. The rest of the time I followed my friends loyally around the shops, trying not to loose sight of them and get anxious.

It was a good day, but I am glad it is over and hope not to need to repeat it again for a while, I think it may take months for me to recover. Plus I missed my munchkins more than any one could imagine, after all, I would hate for them to forget me!