I am feeling really ill, I binged earlier and am now suffering, obviously purged, but I am still feeling shit, my stomach hurts, it feels triple the size. Why am I so weak? I feel pathetic, I am so angry at myself.
My psychologist says that I am always going to binge eventually as I have my calorie intake so low and it sets you up to 'fail', but back in 2008 I never binged even though my calorie intake was lower, I had so much will power back then, I never went over my calorie limit, no matter what. It is that control that I so crave, that knowledge that under no circumstance will I fail. I need that back.
About Me
- I love Bob Betty
- Emotionally Unstable Personality Disorder,Depression and Anorexia,I am described as a 'chronic' self harmer.My pets are my life,why don't you get to know us :)
I'm currently in the same situation hun, and I know it's a bitch.
ReplyDeleteI used to be so good at it and don't know whats happened to me.
The good thing is though I can look at your situation through different eyes then how I look at mine, when I think of you I see someone who has been put through so much and results in coping mechanisms that aren't very nice, but at the time feel so absoltuely necessary, (although I know i'm a hypocrite saying all this)
I really do care about you Amy, considering i've never met you and we live in opposite ends of the world, I have grown to really appreciate you and care about your well being,
so please hang in there, I know it's tough but we can get through it :)
xoxo