Definitely been a low day

Today has definitely been a low day, I have once again gone back to being very tearful. I did do something positive though. I phoned a help line, which is something I would never normally do, the helpline was for adult survivors of abuse, the lady I spoke to was amazing, she helped me to sort through some traumatic memories and flashbacks that I have been having recently. Most of the conversation involved me hysterically crying, but she was brilliant, she listened to me and was patient with me, she made me understand that none of it was my fault. I really think phoning them was a big help and it was definitely the type of support I needed today.

My restricting is on target, I have not gone above my calorie amount for well over a week, I feel so committed to it and that makes me feel so powerful.

I uploaded a video to my youtube channel that contained pictures of my scars, I really wasn't sure whether to do it or not, but I decided that even if it only helps one person it will be worth it. My hope is that people will look at it and get help for themselves before their self harm gets to the point mine has. That is my hope, but I hope people don't think I am proud of my scars and just showing off, as that definitely isn't the case.