So it has been a dramatic few days, I am glad they are over and I do not want to repeat them again.
Today I am starting a fresh, I got prescribed sleeping tablets today, only for a week, but a week of good sleep should hopefully help with my extremely exhausted mind and body, in turn I should have more energy to kick start my recovery.
From now on I am going to be 100 percent honest with my psychologist, it is the only way to truly let her help me. She said something earlier that really made me think, she said "I have been holding my arm out to you for three years, it is up to you to take it". She is right, she can't make me better, only I can make me better.
I am fed up with being ill, I am fed up with living my my life on hold. I am going to start to live life properly again.
My new psychiatrist accused me of having a substance abuse problem earlier, not the best way to start on our first appointment together, seeing as I don't have a substance abuse problem. It turned out he had got me mixed up with another patient, a simple mistake to make you may say, but it would have been fine if he had of listened to me when I said he was mistaken, instead he told me I was wrong and spent ages flicking through my file to show me the proof of my addiction, until finally admitting defeat. What a great start!
Any ways, I am off to have a bath, take a sleeping pill and have a good nights sleep, it may only be 20 mins past 8, but I can't wait to get to bed. SLEEP YAY!!!!
About Me
- I love Bob Betty
- Emotionally Unstable Personality Disorder,Depression and Anorexia,I am described as a 'chronic' self harmer.My pets are my life,why don't you get to know us :)
Reading that has made my day :)
ReplyDeleteI know you're still hurting but the fact that you've conciously made the decision to be as honest as you can is a great step, i'm proud of you, it's something i'm still struggling with doing but I truly hope it works out for you,
As for the pschiatrist, i've had many situations like that where they simply refuse to believe what your saying, it's like your too 'sick' for your words to matter to them sometimes :\
Massive hugs,
xoxo